Funny!

[AshBailey]

An old chap, 85 years old, goes to his doctor and asks for a sperm count.

“You’re 85 years old, Mr Smith, why on earth do you need a sperm count?” asks the doctor, somewhat bemused.

“I know my darn rights, doctor, and I want a darn sperm count doing, alright???” Mr Smith wasn’t happy.

The doctor takes a sample bottle from his draw, and hands it to Mr Smith.

“Do what you need to in this bottle, once you have a sample, bring it back to see me” says the smiling doctor, trying not to laugh.


Two days pass, and Mr Smith creaks into the doctor’s surgery, and slumps down in the seat opposite the doctor.

Mr Smith slams an empty sample bottle down hard on the desk.

“Where’s the sample” ask the doctor.

Mr Smith starts, getting more and more flustered.

“It’s no darn good doctor. I’ve been trying for two days, and I just can’t do it.

I’ve tried my left hand

I’ve tried my right hand

I’ve banged it on a table, I even got my wife involved, and she’s got arthritis

She wasn’t happy

She tried her left hand

Then her right

Then she got me to hold it while she tried

Finally she had a brain wave!

She tried doing it with her mouth, STILL NO GOOD

So she took her teeth out. And had another go.


Despite everything we tried,





WE COULDN’T GET THE TOP OFF THE darn BOTTLE!”

[herc15]